whats lame is that i want to update on here all the time but i can barely steal a connection long enough to check my email let alone log into awesometown to update. luckily my beloved doll has the hook-up so she just lets you peaches know whats going on for me. so kittens i'll let you in on whats new with me. hmmm... ok so i totally dig a boy. yup, it happened. and its not like i haven't tried really hard to be socially awkward and more or less a hermit for the last 6 months. oh well. i'm doomed to like those southern boys its almost a curse. also in awesome news, its my birthday on tuesday. yes my little peaches your quinne will be a terrifying 24 years old next week. so buy me books and cool necklaces. or just say happy birthday. hmm... my little sister will be in the bay on monday for all of next week and i'm suuuuper excited about that. about a week after that i'm going on a super top secret mission for my mental and sexual health and i'm pretty sure life should be calming down after that for a bit. oh wait, JK then the likes of kevin and then monica, casper and my love chris hues will all be making an appearance in central awesometown in may. yes folks i like my life full of beautiful people and lots of awesome. this weekend dangerrr and i will be shooting for our book possibly in napa. ohhhh shit! yep life if good. go outside and enjoy it kitties!

dear residents of awesometown,

you should be jealous i get to photograph this hot mami. ow!

<3

quinne

With my feet firmly planted on the ground it’s hard to see over the clouds. And that’s where my mind is. Rolling around watching Judah do a kegstand in slow motion. Watching my memories in reverse and trying to piece it all together. Shit. Did it really all happen this fast? I fly over living rooms and fields full of dogwood flowers and secret rendezvous. I hold tight to my heart confused and hoping not to forget the things that made me  who I am now incase I start to change and want to turn back. A paramour to nobody, but a lover nonetheless. It’s a hard contrast from who I was while I was becoming who I am now. When I was south I used to say “I wish I was, where I was, when I was wishing I was here” words spray painted on a wall in the city of angeles. Those words burned onto the insides of my eyelids. I don’t know now if I wish anything. I wonder. I don’t wish. In the 8^th window seat on the right side of a greyhound bus… I always want to sit on the right window or the inside seat of the booth. These quirks that I’ve established and polished like fine silver, define me more then anything else. What If I forget? What if I become overwhelmed while changing next time? Or is this it I wonder. A wandering wonderer. It’s not a bad way to be, having your mind spread thin over a universe of  surprise and desire. Tic tack toeing its way in and out of the craters other minds created before it. so familiar isn’t it? when I think of déjà vu I think of dreams I had when I was little about floating in the purple sky with the stars over a red and orange desert.

oh good lord, do i ever want a fucking soy burger!!! knowing i have the stuff to make it in my fridge is kinda killing me. so, i've started to detox/cleanse for 10 days. which means i drink a lot of water, a weird magic potion i make daily and peppermint tea(as a treat when i get too sick of the potion). when i was on my run this morning with the bentley i swore i was going to die. stopping occasionally to catch my breath and that never happens. i understand that taking out solid food for awhile will probably leave me light headed on occasion and apparently breathless. that being said, it is really important for me to prove to myself that i am in control of my life and not my urges, whims or crutches... it might seem small but it's really important to me. so i'll keep you posted on how this works out for me. in other news i'm going to santa cruz tomorrow to hang out with my beloved scully and the little redhead boy she grew in her womb. i f-ing love that kid. so i'm going to wake my punk ass up early and bus on down there. awesomely enough dangerrr and i will be shooting some photos in that area on saturday, so we're gonna meet up and get to the awesome down there.

ok, and for good measure i'll post a a blurb that totes inspired me today. and by inspired i mean helped convince me not to binge on hot peanuts and fried tofu.

"The same courage and pioneering spirit that prompts us to draft long-term life plans can aid us when we are compelled by circumstance or our own dreams to immerse ourselves in the unknown. Thoughts of setting out into territories unexplored can shake us to our very cores. Personal growth is nourished by the ground we break, however. When we must willingly embark upon a journey of exploration, calling upon the optimistic outlook that fuels our ambitions enables us to look into a veiled future with a hopeful heart. As we consider the unknown from a perspective of positivity, we’ll be more apt to muse upon the numerous rewards waiting for us rather than the possible pitfalls we may encounter."

ah, los angeles. i'm in LA right now on... business lets call it. the weather is perfect, which means colder then it ought to be in LA. dangerrr is holding town the fort and makin' sure the bentley stays alive and eats and all that great stuff. i'm really excited about this website/book/life. im not shooting nearly enough photos while i'm down here so maybe i could start since i venture back to awesometown tomorrow. everytime i'm here i battle with the idea of living here. i do love it but today is an illusion, it is never this breezy and cool or quiet here, once i leave my friend sean's apartment it will be all trannys and waifs and although i love a good tanny the hollywood this is not for me! this is an uneventful first blog, i know. i promise the next will be more awesome and possibly will contain some photos. stay awesome, i'm going to order yummy.com and watch movies 'til i have to work.